Are you repeatedly drawn to emotionally unavailable partners? Discover the deep-rooted causes behind this pattern and learn how to break free from it. This video delves into childhood experiences, love blueprints, and somatic work to rewire your relationship dynamics.
In the video titled "Why You Keep Attracting Emotionally Unavailable Men (+ How To Stop)," Amy Kerr delves into the perplexing issue of why some individuals continuously find themselves drawn to emotionally unavailable partners. The content centers around understanding the underlying causes of this pattern and offers insights into how to break free from it. This summary encapsulates the key points discussed in the video
The Love Blueprint Amy Kerr begins by emphasizing the concept of a "love blueprint." This blueprint is formed during a person's earliest relationships within their family of origin and significantly influences their choices in potential partners during adulthood. The type of partners one is drawn to often reflects the dynamics experienced in their family, creating a sense of familiarity in relationships.
Childhood Wounds and Unworthiness The video highlights that individuals who find themselves attracted to emotionally unavailable partners typically have a childhood wound related to unworthiness. As children, they may not have received the love and validation they needed, leading them to internalize a belief that they are not worthy of love. This belief is carried into adulthood and influences their relationship choices.
Projection and Emotional Unavailability Amy Kerr explains that individuals trapped in this pattern often project their feelings of unworthiness onto their emotionally unavailable partners. They seek love and validation from these partners, hoping to heal their childhood wounds. However, the emotionally unavailable partners cannot provide the love and validation required, perpetuating the cycle of emotional unavailability.
A Safe Relationship Illusion Surprisingly, the video reveals that there is a subconscious payoff in this pattern. People are drawn to emotionally unavailable partners because it allows them to maintain a sense of safety. By not fully revealing themselves, they can control how they are perceived in the relationship, which aligns with their feelings of shame and unworthiness.
Rewiring the Love Blueprint To break free from this pattern, Amy Kerr emphasizes the importance of somatic work and self-cultivation. Rewiring the love blueprint requires addressing the issue at the level of the body. Recognizing and breaking the addiction to the emotional rollercoaster of attachment is crucial. Cutting off contact with emotionally unavailable partners or setting clear boundaries is a key step in this process.
Practical Steps The video suggests starting with small actions to build a practice of self-cultivation. This includes saying no to people, places, and things that do not serve one's well-being. By doing so, individuals can gradually shift their self-worth at the body level, learning to choose themselves over patterns of self-abandonment.
In conclusion, the video provides valuable insights into the roots of the pattern of attracting emotionally unavailable partners and offers a path toward breaking free from this cycle by addressing the issue at its core - the individual's self-worth and emotional patterns.
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